To the expecting mother, expecting teen mom and her supporting mother:
The Lord placed in my heart to intercede and cry out on behalf of the teen moms, their moms, and other mothers that are contemplating or even decided on abortion. The Lord said to me, “The way you cried out on your behalf, and I answered you, cry out on their behalf. In the same manner I will have mercy and answer them, and give them a sign.” Psalms 65:5 says that by awesome deeds in righteousness the Lord answers us! That is exactly what happened when I was desperate for an answer, seeking a way that would bring an end to a path of destruction to an unborn life. There are many excuses that the enemy gives us to justify abortion – pregnancy out of wedlock, pregnancy from adultery, rape, mistake/night out, fear of a doctor’s report of baby coming out certain way, mom dying, or not making it. The night I was contemplating murder in 2010, I cried out to the Lord: “God send me a sign!! I don’t want to be a murderer! Help me Lord!”
Here is how it started 14 years ago. All it took was one year. In one year I carried out all the lusts of the flesh that I wished and wanted to please. I moved out of my mom’s house from a place of rebellion – I didn’t want rules; I wanted the life of partying, drinking, drugs, sex, money, no accountability and no authority. I could barely take care of myself in this moment, and I was deceived with the idea that this lifestyle was a great idea. In this year I was kicked out from one, two, three places, spending nights in my car, and paying for a hotel for the days I could until the money ran out. At the last place landed I was saved and spared from going to jail for assault on a family member and instead I was just kicked out and escorted by police officers. I gathered what I could in laundry baskets, and whatever else fit in my car. When I finally ran out of options, I asked my mom to let me go back to her house, but I did not know that I was pregnant yet. I sucked up the pride inside me, and ran back home with shame and guilt.
To add the cherry on top, I started being awakened in the early hours of the morning to the rush of running to the restroom to vomit. Three positive pregnancy tests later yet, I was in denial. I couldn’t believe it, and I couldn’t wrap my head around it! Surely, I couldn’t be bringing a child into my world of chaos and disorder. I thought my body wasn’t even capable of holding life inside it with the stuff I was placing into it. The two people I delivered the news to were naïve themselves and supportive in whichever way I went with keeping the child or not. The one person that could help me was manipulating me into getting the abortion. Surely, I thought my mom would kick me out thinking that I only went back to her house because I was pregnant. But I did not find out until I was there. I knew if I was kicked out I had no where to go and where a door was open it wasn’t secure due to circumstances. What was I going to do with a baby on the streets?
When we don’t see any way through, God sees it! We can be deceived to the point of justifying and reasoning our way to an abortion clinic, or even an at-home remedy. Press in though, and you will find the reality of the matter is not seeing all the way through that this life you hold within you is cherished and wanted, and so are you…
…to be continued… only keep pressing in!